Updating....

It's been a while since I have posted anything because it's been crazy around here. Also I have felt like I was in limbo and didn't know how to feel playing the waiting game. Well the waiting game is over, all is GOOD! for those of you trying to figure out what I'm talking about the explanation follows.

I was playing cards one friday night at my sisters house and experienced some dizzy spells. It caught me off guard and I wasn't sure what was happening. I started calculating and thought maybe, but then brushed it off as no way. The doctor had told me I was premenopausal and had diminished reserve of eggs and my estrogen was abnormally low and needed supplemented. So I thought what the heck, for giggles I will buy a test. I was at dollar tree getting some stuff for James and picked up a pregnancy test. I took it and to my amazement it was positive. I didn't believe it and I bought 2 more to take and told shalonda if it came up positive again I was making her test. Well it came came back positive again, and no I didn't make her test! Mainly because she was running to the store to get a digital test to prove to me what I was seeing. Long story short, I'M PREGNANT!!

Shalonda and I kept the secret for a couple days from Andy. How was a suppose to tell him? I was scared to death to tell him. Things have been hard for us this year and to add this to the mix was adding fuel to the fire. Shalonda came up with the idea of putting a shirt on James saying, "I'm gonna be a big brother". So we did, and marched him out to the living room. I stayed in the bedroom biting my fingernails waiting for the explosion from the living room. Silence was all I heard... After some prodding from Vanessa, Andy finally read the shirt and marched down the room. The shock on his face was priceless and his words were golden, "How did that happen?" I just looked at him in disbelief. We already have 3 children and he's looking at me asking how I got pregnant.

With my history of miscarriage I have been reluctant to share the news with many people. Today I went for my first OB appointment and we saw a heartbeat on the ultrasound and Dr said everything looks fine. So, I am officially announcing Andy & I are expecting our 4th child.

I am scared and excited at the same time. Andy and I have discussed this and can only assume that this is a blessing to come out of all trials we have gone through this year. Announcing it makes it seem real and maybe I can finally feel good about being pregnant. I am experiencing nausea already and not liking that, but I will get through it. To my friends who have held my hand and reassured me these last two weeks, THANK YOU!!